by: Lew Ojeda
On April Fools Day, The Razzies were given out for Hollywood’s most notable subpar achievements of the year, and the big loser was the Adam Sandler abomination Jack & Jill. Astoundingly unconvincing drag, dull weddings, abortions, giddy alcoholism, enabled workaholism, eye-searing CGI, unenticing porn—this year’s nominations presented a checklist of incredibly bad ideas that somehow got the green lights.
When I announced to my friends that I was watching the nominated stinkers in prepping for a post-Razzies podcast, the reaction was something akin to having told them I was going to bungee-jump from the Hancock Building.
“Lew, you don’t need to do this.”
“Oh man, you’re crazy.”
“Hope you survive.”
I completely understand the sentiment. Watching Big Mommas: Like Father Like Son isn’t going to make you think about the best of humanity or even perhaps about living for the next few minutes. But then again, was it ever meant to be? Do you think that the studios and producers who released Abduction, Drive Angry, and I Don’t Know How She Does It really care how you feel about movies?
The time, money and energy wasted by the horrible efforts of Adam Sandler, Michael Bay, Sarah Jessica Parker, Martin Lawrence and others could have been used to promote films deserving a better release (Margaret from director Kenneth Lonergan, hello?).
We need the Razzies to deflate some Zeppelin-sized Hollywood egos and help some wayward talents rediscover their souls. Did Jack & Jill deserve a record 10 Razzies? How bloated have some franchises (Twilight, Transformers, Big Mommas) become? Which film industry insiders need interventions to help choose different careers? Who still has a reputation worth salvaging with bold and adventurous new film projects? Why won’t anyone other than Bill Cosby, Halle Berry and Sandra Bullock be a good sport and accept a Razzie?
Join HEAVEMedia and The Underground Multiplex for our post-Razzies round-up fun and be sure you invite Eddie Murphy to tune in as well.
Lew Ojeda is the co-founder of The Underground Multiplex and has produced features, shorts and live performances in Chicago. He’s previously been responsible for helping create the first gay-themed news & entertainment program in Rochester, NY and wrote reviews for gaysploitation movies when you thought John Waters had the only good shit out there. He can’t coordinate your clothes or style your hair, but he knows plenty about movies that will fuck with your head in the best way possible.